The stars died so that you could be here today

It's been a busy busy few weeks, and it'll be a very busy few more weeks. I wouldn't be in such a deep pit of stress now if not for my silly mistakes in my simulation project. What could have been done in 2 days ended up taking me 7 days due to my carelessness. Thankful for really concerned, nice and helpful coursemates who entertain my silly ramblings and endless questions of how-tos and i-don't-knows and then proceeding to offering me their solutions and helping me debug my circuits. I am really grateful and touched (': Even people whom I never really thought of as 'nice' have been going out of their way to help me. Blessed. Came across this on @tippytoess instagram: And it wets my eyes. To teach me a lesson and to keep me safe during a perilous time. That's exactly what you did. I'm sorry that the time couldn't be longer, but I take heart that my home is once again a home to me. Thank you for providing a home away from home when desp...

Second week of school down only/already. I can't decide which. It seems like it's only the start of school yet there's so much to do already. At the same time I'm so tired and I already have a huge backlog to clear. I really need to stop going out and start sitting down to focus on work. So many things I want to write about, but I'm too lazy to upload photos and edit them. Maybe one day when I'm procrastinating work. Hey, that's what I do best isn't it. I still catch myself feeling sad about things that don't matter anymore. - Kurt Vonnegut. 

We hold on to things sometimes for the comfort of memories. Work is piling up so quickly I'm getting scared. Being scared makes me tired. Feeling tired makes me lazy. Lazy mich has decided that today's homework agenda is: Install C++ reference Install compiler devcpp well at least I got that done.  Time to do some reading. Not reading of lecture notes unfortunately, my brain is not wired up to read in advance / read to consolidate knowledge yet. Reading for leisure, reading to feed my soul. The Book Thief. To escape into another world.  Bye, see you folks.  Save my lazy soul. 

First day of Year 3 in NUS. Time is flying past us. It felt like yesterday when I was a freshman, and now suddenly I'm in my second half of university life. I have to cherish this two years and finally gain some momentum in my last schooling days. Heartbreak has led me to realize that I've let myself feel bad, be distracted and bothered over undeserving things for too long. So, here's to a burden-less, hardworking, enriching semester ahead. I have to say though, that having the worst diarrhoea I've ever had wasn't a perfect start to the year. I had great apprehensions to the start of school again. Lectures and free time were always spent with Soo and Maddy. With us choosing our own electives this semester, and Maddy being the bitch still enjoying her US life, it was going to be a scarily lonely time in school, attending classes like the antisocial loner I am. Life still has to go on, and I am glad to say that the first day wasn't as bad as I thought it would b...

Happy girl is a Michelle today! Have been in such a bad mood, whining and complaining everyday from the longest run of mid terms ever, 3 weeks ( and counting given 2012 prof decided to give us a quiz every week from now due to our abysmal performance =.= ). But, now that 3031 project 2 has come to a close, my moods are lifted :D. Just naturally. Our product isn't as ups as the rest, but hey, we tried. The brochure doesn't have such a polished printed finish, but I'm happy! Presentation wasn't as smooth sailing, but it's over!  Hehehheheh, so cute this photo! Presentation = Dress up day! 2 years in EE, and the nicest I've worn to school hahaha :D  Brochure! Hours and hours of designing. Margin alignment is a bitch though. &.. &... OUR VIDEO !!! http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10151345023603107 !! Super cute, go watch :D

Barbara Motter So, my arguments, my train of thoughts, my evaluations are all over simplistic. Sometimes I just don't want to write a balanced argument. I want to simply subscribe to a certain school of thought without considering all the flip-sides. I'm superficial like that. If you're reading this blog, you may not want to. You might get influenced by my lousy writing.

Heh so I've let my blog rot for quite awhile. Been telling myself that I have to do SATs over everything else for this whole week, but I always round up lazing around, lying on my bed, watching the tv, eating. Anything but doing work. God help take away my procrastination D: It's always annoying when I reach home from school, wet from the rain, and I naturally decide I can't go jogging. But magically after I bathe and settle down, half an hour later, the skies are bright blue, the sun is shining like nobody's business and the floor is dry. The powers to be just want me to sit on my ass in front of the computer and grow fat fat fat, so that I become a 100 kg lady with fats squashing my innards, crushing my lungs and dilating my heart. I don't like teachers who seem to love to impose their own ideas on others, and think that they're always right. Sure they have a wealth of experience more than us, more knowledge then us, but it doesn't mean that they know ever...

I'm really beginning to get turned off by GP. There are so many parallels with Literature in the questions, the emphasis they place on inference, on tone and attitudes and literary devices, but there isn't any similarities when it comes down to answering the questions. It's almost like, they expect a standard answer, from a very non-standardised kind of questions, the kind of questions that ask how you feel, how you think, how you understand something. And I just don't think that a reasonable answer can be marked wrong, just because the setter wishes to emphasis on something else? It's ridiculous. Makes me miss the times in Lit, when we actually saw through a unique, different answer by using evidence to support it. Nothing was deemed as "No, you're wrong". I think the way GP is going, it's going to suck the brains out of us. They just don't want to accept our views. So, I wanted to do more photoshopping and go through some funky tutorial on fo...

BSBS D, my grades are bullshit. I need to work harder, smarter, more efficiently. It's veeery bad thinking of how to break it to my parents. :/ Finally starting to jog again is awesome. It's amazing how before jogging you can feel just washed out and tired, but after jogging, a refreshing feel overwhelms you (: Exercising is good. At the very least I dont' feel fats hanging from my calves so much. Going through all those stunning wallpapers on the internet, photoshop tutorials, my old photoshop files, I think made me want to pick up photoshop again. But I guess the progress I make in photoshop is hampered by my lack of creativity and artistic skills. The creativity of those artists who can create creepily cool and breathtaking images from nothing should be revered. It's like their brain ticks in a different way. I don't think I can ever visualise some concept in my head and then translate it to paper. Guess it speaks volumes of how much I think. It's not very co...

I just realised the reality of informing parents that I, their dear daughter, has failed Chem twice in a row. 43%. And that isn't a pretty picture. Its a son-of-a-bitch of a reality. It's always at this point of time wherein I panic, and regret not studying harder, though I can't quite change anything already. That panic should probably kick in 1 month before the exams where I actually can do something. Pity my reaction system is a tad delayed. And I don't seem to have conditioned to the idea of: Panic way before exam > Study > Do relatively ok > Happily ever after. It's probably also not good that I don't think critically enough. Observing and thinking should be natural. Just not coming to me. So there was a talk on how to write personal statements. So people get coached on how to write personal statements. Any random person's personal statement can be transformed from a bland boring one into a pretty, inspiring, lovely, memorable, unique one with ...

"Your death's like the sun: You can't look straight at it for longer than a second or two. The looming-up momentarily annihilates everything else, then lets it all back in." - Glen Duncan, The Bloodstone Papers. It's terrible that I keep sleeping in the canteen every morning. But that extra 1 hour or so of sleep is very very satisfying, though it does rob me of the time to talk to friends or try to catch up on abit of tutorial or read my book. The early morning RJ canteen is pretty interesting though. There's a calm quietness about it amidst the bustle of the stallholders getting ready for the day. One or two Indian workers will play their music sometimes. And just watching sleepy bleary-eyed people walking through the canteen can fill up my time. Event of the day: Elizabeth, Tingfang and Michelle are walking up the stairs. Zewei is one flight of stairs below them. He calls Michelle. Three of them look down, laugh then runs off, because nobody wants to talk t...

It's times like this that the inadequacies of my intellectual capacity is highlighted isn't it. GP essay was a trainwreck. "Going green is a luxury that only developed countries can afford". Discuss. So, my failure to evaluate the idea that being environmentally conscious is not a luxury, but rather a necessity in progressing in today's world, coupled with my inability to articulate my argument in a balanced and not-so-extreme way would probably be rewarded with more failure in terms of marks. Vicious cycle is this not. Won't life be so much easier if all I had to do was to be repulsed at Kara Dioguardi pouting at and velcrose-ing herself to Simon Cowell.

Give me my convoluted, run-of-the-mill plots of novelists over the words of opinionated expository authors (who probably don't give a damn about their counter-arguments ) any day.

I wish I could stay awake without the coffee. Feels good to be paying attention and actually thinking after a year of sleeping, doodling and stoning. Damn I need to sleep earlier. But I just wasted 2+ hours of my time watching American Idol and am wasting more time hereeee. D: But watching Alex Lambert is totally worth it. Sweetest boy ever. I CAN'T HELP BUT S M I L E E OH EM GEE HEEEE. (Photo Spam hahahah) WHEEE. I WANT HIM TO WIN RAWR. It's funny how, though I still like rock music, I'm a huger fan of slower, raspier, soulful-er stuff like Paolo Nutini, James Morrison, Mat Kearney & Alex Lambert :D. Maybe I'm getting OLD. Oh wells. I think it's something to do with my tendency to loop songs forever and ever. Avenged Sevenfold on loop for the whole day would just kill my ears. I need to write betterrrr. My GP essays stink. Even though I redid my essay, I still have weak arguments, lousy phrasing, disgusting words, incoherent expressions. Oh wells. Need. To. Re...

So Class Learning Journey yesterday. Doubt we learnt anything watching old women acting as students - according to Kenneth - though. Most of us anyways. Not much of a bonding session for the class either. But, 'twas fun taking lesbian shots in front of Valentine's Day displays with Elizabeth and Tingfang and getting laughed at by blading chubby ang mohs. My dad really intends for me to study engineering o0. Highly doubt I'm going to do it, but I'm not saying anything more than a 'maybe I will' now. Wait until my results come back, then I'll launch into a quarrel with him lalalala. Pointless to do it now anyways. Need to study firsttt. Amazing how I'm wasting my time away in front of the computer. And the only B I got during promos - for GP, probably is down the drain now, seeing how my essay got torn apart by Miss Tan ):

School sucks. I suckkk. Everybody's been saying I put on weight o0. I didn't really need any verbal confirmation of that :/ Need to exercise rawr. CCA is becoming more and more of a sians-fest. Every Wednesday, I pop by to the computer lab, get disgusted by a certain someone someone, basically stone in front of the computer, and get dismissed. I don't even see why I bring my laptop to school anymores. I don't do anything. Doesn't help that I gave most of my knowledge back to Joel. Well, though it was quite fun talking cock in the canteen last friday with my OG. House partayyae on thursday ♥ MT' 07 Awesomest thing in the whole week. But I guess my week sucked so badly, the standard for awesomest was quite low. Seeing the OG together, even though some didn't come was great (: Lo-hei-ing with them was super funzz too (: It's just different doing it with friends than with family. Then, they gave me this ! SO PRETTYZ (: But I disagree kk, I DONT DO THAT POS...