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It was a productive shopping trip with my mom today!

1 dress + 1 blouse + 1 romper-ish dress (I have no idea) + 1 cardigan = $77.90
OMG. Do you have any idea how happy I am?! And I got this all in Orchard! Buying cheap nice things makes me so happy :D. #auntymode

First CNY loot that I really like :D. // Sidenote: I hate how Instasize compressed the image so much it's now pixelated ugh.

But at the same time shopping makes me really upset. I have a really low metabolism rate, and coupled with my humongous appetite (I'm positive that I have a man's stomach), it's very hard to maintain a figure that can actually fit into clothes. What's even worse is that I'm currently at a size that's slightly too large for S / XS and too small for M. Impossible to find fitting clothes. Clothes shops should really carry more sleeved articles that are dressier looking. More specifically, sleeves that are larger. I naturally have larger arms, as compared to my legs / hips, and it's almost impossible to look good in dressier items ( hence the cardigan).

I don't have the metabolism rate of most girls, in fact I think I have the metabolism of an old woman. I probably have to eat like a rabbit to fit into some of those blogshop clothes. Anyhows, to even maintain at my current weight I have to work out NON-STOP. I literally mean 5 days of running 5KM each and a day of maybe 7KM if I can manage to find a longer work out slot. It's either that or I start putting on weight again. Pure fat or bloatedness, I still start finding myself, larger than before. And I really have to watch what I eat too. Even then, when it comes to shopping I have to dig and dig and dig to find something that fits me. Life's kind of tiresome now, why can't fat be the new skinny. Why is being ultra-slim so prized ?!

I'm well aware that I'm being hypocritical by criticizing the views on women's body. While I can recognize the faults, I myself can't escape from adopting these same views, and perpetuating it. Over the last few months, after some tough periods, I dropped quite abit of weight. Still, I feel like a whale after putting back maybe 2KGs in the past month (or maybe it's withdrawal symptoms from the lack of exercise, though it was only a 1 week block out period), and I've been quite obsessed with ramping up my running schedule.

Everyday I look in the mirror and I see flaws. Maybe it's time to change my mentality.


*OK, sidenote, I DO NOT have a eating disorder or whatever crap. This is written in response to feeling exhausted from trying to eat healthily and not being able to eat all those delicious fried food, just to be able to look nicer in clothes.*

*Edit: Really happy that I am following through on my 2014 promise to run more, longer and faster. I have the stamina to run faster than a male WHEE. Ok, a slow running male to be precise, but I'm still happy*

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