The stars died so that you could be here today

Another semester, another bad start to exams. Progressively became more and more despondent as I started on each new question. It's even more depressing because I actually did put in effort for this. Shall leave it behind and pray for the best. There isn't much time left for me to give thought about what I want to specialize in. Studying Signals and Systems was actually quite nice. The thought was to head in that direction, but after that disaster of a paper, maybe not. We'll see how the rest goes. #study ___________________________________________________________________________________ Why would anyone want to talk to me? Why would anyone want to have lunch with me? Why would anyone want to accompany me? I wouldn't. There are things I could and should do, but I will not. Maybe it makes me vulnerable and that's why I don't. Back to that same old place again. I made up my mind to forget and move on. But days like the past few pins me firmly to...

No 姐弟恋. Highlight. Highlight. Repeat. Repeat. End of. Make up your mind and stick with it bitch. 

It's starting to become one big emotional rollercoaster again. These are things that I shouldn't let affect me. Especially not in times of academic importance. Finals are around the corner. It should be much easier studying this time round, given I have 90% less webcasts to watch as compared to the last two semesters. // So tempted to drink the Erdinger. // Ich wünsche das Erdinger Weißbier trinken.  // Ich bin verloren; Du machst mich verrückt; 

2011 was so disastrous. The worst part: all my mistakes were careless. So many mistakes, and I kind of gave up the last 30 min instead of checking. Regrets all the time. Crazy month up ahead. Tests, assignments, assessments, exams. Can't afford to be distracted right now. It's quite sad how badly I need to improve my grades. Hahaha. And here I am just because I don't want to start webcasting or studying for German. Copying has become so part and parcel of Uni life, I came to accept it. That, someone can just score full marks without even having studying for it. Today though, the Professor merrily went up to people whom he caught/saw talking/cheating and marked their scripts. Uh-oh. Uh-oh and hahaha. haha. My brother's been in China for 1 + week already. The house is so peaceful without him creating a ruckus all the time. He's been calling home every night, and last night he told my mom he had diarrhoea and fever. I'm suppossed to be worried right? Am not. ...

Really really want to travel alone right now. To wherever. I supposse all I really want is to be carefree, and hop on any damn train I want to any damn place without discussing or reaching a compromise with anyone. Longing for this all the time.