The stars died so that you could be here today

I honestly feel crappy about myself 24/7. I just want to feel good sometimes dammit. On diverging paths, never to intersect.

Where do I begin... I'm just a mess, basically. I wished I didn't care about anything most of the time. Sometimes it gets difficult waiting on people all the time. My dad taught me: Never make others wait. I remember he used to fly into rages when anybody made him wait. I was taught being early was a virtue ( ok, doesn't apply to school I'm sorry. Nothing applies to school. It's a different entity entirely. It exists in it's own special universe. ). Over the years I realise I grew to expect things from people. Then, I grew to realise that nobody bothers. When no one bothers to actually be on time, to actually reply after receiving a question, a message, what's the point. Letting go of it is easier than feeling like a ghost, an invisible being, that isn't worth 2 minutes of someone else's life, for them to think of a response. If you care you'd reply. You'd actually give me an answer. And not, yeah, maybe. Maybe I'd be free. Guess wh

HAPPY DEEPAVALI! ^^ Awfully Chocolate, my favourite.  I <3 my parents. Never thought I'd be eating all over Joo Chiat, hanging around Awfully Chocolate with my parents. They might not like to go out much, but they're quite hip haha. These lessons that we've learned here; Have only just begun. Just begun

Always the shit hole people pour their shit into. #ohkaycan

Sometimes, I just need an ear . Instead of always being the one listening to all the shit, concerning and caring .

I don't know where this is leading to. Oh wells, let's just take the chance and go on the path to nowhere. Maybe it'll bring me somewhere. Still missing. 

Just what the fuck seriously. The whole world damn cute to me today, I just want to die. Yea whole world minus C. whateven.

It's Week 9 already? You kidding me right.  Let's see, the stand out events of my life of late.  Drove without my dad in the car, likea finally !  Drive to airport at 10pm to pick brother up > Forget to on head lights > Think why the hell can't I see anything > Michelle is fail.  Finished Mid-Terms on a disastrous note.  The list of nicknames I'm giving to people are expanding exponentially. Gay Boy, Socks, Same shirt, Coffeeshop uncle, Gold Digger, Annoying voice, Annoying A, Annoying B, Annoying C, Annoying D, Annoying Z, Mega Annoying Guy.  OK Mega Annoying Guy piss me off so badly. Fucking run things through your head before you speak. No. Idea. How. Your Girlfriend. Stands. You.  3 topics of Maths, 3 sets of lecture notes of 1002, 3 (? I don't even know, god bless) topics of CS, countless EC1301 to catch up. Cancelling any remaining life I actually had. 

Finally the end of rushing to finish graded asssignments. Time to catch up on work. Sometimes, I feel that emptiness walking along the corridors of engine. On a hair-pee note, apparently I have a lovely voice ! & I really think my PW OP presentation slides damn nice & ups.

Exam after exam. Assignment after assignment. Project after project. Disappointment after disappointment. Beyond the realm of tiredness. I swear one of the reasons is because I'm not getting enough food.

D: How come my nails still have bedsheet prints even though I painted them 3 hours before sleeping ??  And I never get how they're so soft I can leave marks when I press them with my nails.  Didn't realise I destroyed my thumb's nail polish.  Oh gawd, I suck. I need a manicure. 

Too tired. Eyes just want to close when I read my notes. Very irritated. Bad day, very. See, I always make the same mistake. Same old, same old. I wish I would spare myself this.